Five Tips for Working Moms

My sweet friend Ashleigh (we had special education classes together at BYU) recently asked me to guest post on her blog. She wanted to know some of my thoughts on being a mom, having a job, keeping it real, and having fun.

Special education teacher by day – Momma by night. That’s my gig. I won’t lie to you – it’s tough. I consider myself lucky that I do, in fact, love my job. Obviously, there are good and bad days, but I consider myself happy at work.

Here are my 5 tips for working moms – and keep in mind – I am NOT perfect at any of them (ok, maybe #5 :D) and these are just a few of the things that have worked for me.

1. Shift gears. What I mean is shifting mindsets – from job to home. I struggle with this; it’s only recently come to my attention that I even do it! At school, I expect my students to behave a certain way and I don’t put up with anything less. I run a tight ship and my students know I mean business. However, at home, I have a hard time relaxing and expecting less than perfection. It’s ok to be Mrs. Kaylynn by day as long as I remember to be mom at night.  Are you bringing your work mentality home with you? I definitely was….

2. Put your phone to bed – so to speak. I am away from my phone most of the day, so when I’m off at 4 it’s time to check in, respond to emails, catch up on Facebook, browse Instagram, etc etc. I didn’t think it really bothered Tab until she came up to me, pushed the top button (the one that puts the iPhone to sleep) and said, “Mama, phone away.” There you have it. Tell me how you REALLY feel Tab! Now, unless she’s entertaining herself, I keep the phone off away and try to enjoy her. (THIS article was wonderful and made me think, “I don’t want to MISS anything!”)

3. Try to involve your child. Yes, it will take longer (whatever the task is) but I’ll put money on the fact that once your child is helping or has a “job” they will be happier and you’ll get a lot more done. Talk to your child. Explain to them what you are doing. It’ll seem awkward at first – like you’re talking to yourself – but it will help your child develop language skills as well as a relationship.

4. DON’T FEEL GUILTY and DON’T COMPARE. I’m guilty…OH SO guilty…but seriously. We live in a world that is so saturated with social media and everyone has their lives out there for the world to see. (This article was AMAZING for me!) Most of the blogs I {used to} read were so sugary sweet and full of fluff. Nothing real – only posts about how perfect their lives were. No matter what, I felt inadequate because my life isn’t perfect! NEWS FLASH! Raising kids is hard! NEWSFLASH #2: It’s hard for EVERYONE … not just you.  I always forget: most blogs only put their BEST out there. Don’t get caught up trying to be like everyone else or having the “perfect life” that they seemingly have – they have the same insecurities you do, they just don’t share.

5. Take “YOU” time – Find your happy place and go there as often as possible. There are days when I am on edge. I can sense it and Tab can too. Those are the times I step away and I feel guilty about it. But it’s ok – it’s normal even! My dear husband is an angel on these nights – he takes my Tab and gives me my space. Sometimes it’s 5 minutes, other times it’s an hour. No shame in taking care of YOURSELF. I feel better when I bake, craft, or exercise. These things give me a sense of accomplishment that I don’t always get from work or my little one. Find a way to recognize how awesome you are and do it. Do it now!

As often as you can, relax and eat a dessert: Even though there’s 47 projects awaiting and dishes in the sink, I try to sit and relax. TRY being the key word. I have SO not mastered this one yet, but I need to be better. Take a deep breath and shove something chocolaty in my mouth – heck yes. Because I deserve it…pretty much always!

Obviously these aren’t the end-all in tips for a working mom, but they have been the best for ME. This is what works in my home and if it work for you too, then that’s fabulous. For me, it’s been about keeping an open mind and staying positive.

I know there are a lot of wonderful working moms out there – What tips would you add?